PS4 Wins

What a crazy tech world when Sony is needed to prevent a megacorp from taking us into DRM hell.

I really needed that video after seeing Microsoft spend the last two years treating paying customers like scum while pushing failed ideas.

The last few years have been trying for Windows developers and other Microsoft professionals. We've watched Microsoft ignore our complaints in the hope that they can convince the mass market and lure us back in with market share, only to find out that we were right and instead of acknowledging their mistakes they keep doubling down on stupid.

You guys in Redmond are really fucking up.

Zune

Kin

Windows Phone

Surface

Visual Studio 2012

Office 13

Windows 8

Xbox One

Everyone single one of these products had negative feedback before release but you assheads in Redmond wouldn't listen.

Take a long look at that list and stop blaming the fucking media or "fear of change" which I saw the Xbox VP resorting to today. That's a long list that cannot be explained by external factors.

You Microsoft defending whores in the media are just digging yourselves deeper along with the company. Paul Thorrott, Hal and Peter Bright keep defending the ship as it hits iceberg after iceberg with an ever long list of shoddy excuses about "future plans" and long term strategies. Well you see guys by hitting that last iceberg Ballmer is able to flood the front of the ship to even it with the rear. Eh?

Something is very wrong with the company when they have that much cash (75 billion on hand) and yet the vast majority of their last releases have been either outscored or outsold by previous versions. Worse is that there was never such an insulting response to those of us that sell, create or manage Microsoft solutions. We called the Windows 8 plan fucking stupid from the start and the public agrees. I don't care if Microsoft is making billions, my dog could sit in Ballmer's chair and lick his nuts and the company would make billions. If they only sold XP and never created ANYTHING since then they would still make billions. Office and Windows are as established as the metric system which is why they can have a long list of fuck-ups and still make money. But it doesn't excuse that long list of fuck-ups and their relationship with existing customers is deteriorating. Windows 8.1 is an insult as it doesn't address the #1 complaint (MAKE METRO OPTIONAL) and since their tablet strategy has already FUCKING FAILED I'm still not seeing the logic behind pissing off hundreds of millions of customers to sell a few million tablets that will net them zero profit thanks to the development and marketing costs.

Ballmer is a FUCKING IDIOT and if Microsoft was a democracy by developers he would be voted out and the stock would jump at least 50% overnight. If he was replaced with a 10 year old girl with only lemonade stand experience their profits would jump as well as she would not force an interface on millions of users that hate it and will certainly not "buy apps" if they spend all day in the desktop.

Oh and you can also forget about selling Windows Phone to any of those pissed off gamers. Fuck them I guess, and fuck the people who are pissed about Windows 8, or Office 13. Microsoft employees and their moms and the future of Windows Phone. That's what is lost in all this which is that you can't piss off customers and expect them to not remember when you are trying to sell a different product. Hey remember how I tried to sell you piss as lemonade and then called you afraid of change for not wanting it? Can I have some of your money?

Boy I can't wait for holiday sales which is when Wall St. will understand the full implications of how quickly they handed the next-gen market to Sony. Just another fuck-up by Ballmer and his gang of slimeballs. Good job guys.

Xbox Done

Xbox Done

Does everything one device does except for all the things you normally expect from a console.

Fucking bullshit really. Fucking unbridled greed.

Microsoft has 73 billion dollars in the bank, yes fanwhores that’s cash in the bank and yet they feel the need to cut the job of some 16 year old working a mom and pop used game store because fuck that kid they need to add some more digits to the bank statement.

So goddamn insulting.

You can still trade games!!! You just have to pay us first……Eh?

You don't have to be online all the time, just once every 24 hours.......Eh?

Ugh. They really hold their customers in contempt and think they can appease them through disingenuous efforts.

It would be like McDonald’s taking away the big mac and then later saying, oh well we’re actually going to bring it back to meet customer feedback. It won’t be the same and in fact is just our latest burger renamed but we think our customers are fucking stupid so we don’t care.

They’re doing the same thing with Windows 8. We’ll bring back the start button (and take you to Metro). That’s really not the problem, it’s the lack of a start button but more importantly the lack of the start menu and being forced into Metro. Microsoft is trying to pretend they care and of course their fanwhores point to these disingenuous actions and say SEE LOOK THEY DO LISTEN.

I’ve never been more disgusted with Microsoft. It’s a company with a lot of smart people that is managed by fucking idiots. Only a fucking idiot would be dismissive of the iPad after it was a success. Only a fucking idiot would approve a UI change that the majority hates and the designer admits is optimized for touch devices that make up less than 1% of the existing market. That’s just fucking stupid. Only a fucking idiot would approve some dingbat designer’s plans to whitewash Office and Visual Studio even though the majority thinks it looks awful. That’s just fucking stupid. What the fuck is the point? How would providing theme options reduce sales when the majority hates your default theme? You would have to be a complete fucking idiot to think that providing optional themes is a bad idea.

Now we get a new Xbox with TEEVEE options that no one asked for. Sony has been talking about “one entertainment device to rule them all” since the PS2 and that hasn’t happened. We can already watch Netflix and Hulu on a dozen devices, TEEVEE BOXES are already here. We want a better 360, not a locked down TEEVEE box that requires paying Microsoft when we want to hand a game to friend or relative.

Fucking bullshit.

Microsoft has some the dumbest leaders in the country. I’m so glad I don’t work for that company, God I would be embarrassed to work for such fucking idiots. The fact that some of you douchebags volunteer your time to defend the actions of these fucking idiots really shows you how sad and pathetic humans can become.

What a goddamn shame. Just a goddamn shame.

Next Xbox update / You don't need iTunes

Well I'm going to hold off my latest Win8 critique due to the upcoming Xbox reveal which is scheduled for tomorrow (May 21st). With NuMicrosoft you never really know what they might do next so I'm curious to see their Xbox plans.

It sounds like they backed off at least on their "always on" requirement which would have been a massive gift to Sony. It's nice to know that there are at least some executives at Microsoft with common sense that will change plans after overwhelmingly negative feedback. I have no doubt that a major factor is that consoles are an area where Microsoft has serious competition, if they had a market lock there is no doubt that they would be telling us about how "always on" is actually good for us and blah blah blah bullshit. Both Microsoft and Sony too easily fall into complacency from success and focus too much on extracting dollars through lame lock-in rather than earning them by offering increased value.

That same lack of value has probably led me away from Windows Phone for good. Windows Phone still doesn't have USB calendar/contact syncing despite this being requested back in 2011, and if your answer is "use this cloud solution that takes more time and isn't what you asked for" then you don't really understand business or how to serve customers. Linux users for years tried advocating these types of half-solutions (don't buy music from itunes and you won't need it, use pdf and not docx, etc) and the world ignored them. Now we have both Windows Phone and Metro advocates telling us "you don't need that" which is just a public acknowledgement of a deficiency. Here's a funny recent example from Harlott actually:

So while grandma is still browsing iTunes for music to buy, real music lovers are turning increasingly to online subscription services like Pandora, Spotify, Nokia Music, Xbox Music, and many others 

Sure Paul, you're not a real music lover if you own 10 gigs of music that you purchased through iTunes. To be a real music lover you have to listen to that same music through a streaming service. Ever heard of data caps?

Anyways back to Windows Phone which is that the entire team seems to have this mentality. This to me is actually more concerning than the lack of progress in areas like sync. Apple has at least made progress in areas where I was critical of them before (iTunes dependencies, crappy usb interface, durability) and while iTunes is still a POS it is at least better in Windows and no longer makes me want to huck the computer across the room.  Meanwhile NuMicrosoft won't even help third party developers handle USB syncing. What the fuck? NuMicrosoft deserves to get it's ass royally kicked in mobile with that attitude and I'm honestly surprised by how many Windows Phones still sell given all the limitations.

So I'm quite curious to see if  NuMicrosoft is going to screw up the next Xbox or if it's actually about giving customers improved value. The Xbox division at least has been insulated from the tasteless design sickness that has infected other products (VS 2012, Office 13, Win8). But that could simply be due to timing and NuMicrosoft may use Xbox to push Windows 8 in some God awful way. The Xbox 360 already has Metro but since you don't multitask with a game console it isn't nearly as annoying and there also aren't needless full screen animations. But we all know NuMicrosoft can take something that people like or at least tolerate and fuck it up in ways they never imagined.

No such thing as a bad interface, fear of change is the problem

Some of you have asked when the hammer will be released. I thought I would answer that question just as Sinofsky would:

I have read your question and I am happy to reply that yes, there will be a comments section in the upcoming blog post. We're not going to remove the comments, so rest assured. I guess that takes care of the critics, doesn't it? :) But then I guess some people have a harder time adapting than others.

The hammer will contain at least 50.3% more images which will make it the most tablet friendly post ever. That's pretty amazing. The amount of images will make it the most post-pc tablet friendly post on the market. Our own metrics in fact tell us that it will be 79.6% better than anything we have done before. Wow, and that's just metrics. That's amazing and I'm proud of the work we have done.

I hope that clears everything up and answers your question.

Thank you very much for your feedback.

Jerkface

Windows RT doesn't make sense

Paul Harlott sez:
This is the role that Windows RT needs to play going forward: A low-cost/free alternative to Android that can run on exactly the same hardware. A $169 Windows RT tablet—hell, a $250 Windows RT tablet—would (wait for it) be a game changer.

So all RT needs to do is match Android on price and it will be a game changer?

Well it's already doing that for Samsung 10.1" tablets and it's getting its ass kicked. People are also choosing Android phones over Windows Phone when the price is the same. Windows RT doesn't make sense because you are trying to sell Windows without Windows compatibility in a market where Android is perceived as a leader and has a better software library. Windows RT is also has the worst fucking name and implies to consumers that it is normal Windows which means you will sour some consumers and they will never give RT another chance after finding out it doesn't work with their printer and is really just IE, Office and some shitty games made by high school students.

Now, full disclosure: I previous argued—correctly, according to sources at Microsoft

Full disclosure, lol. As if those words mean anything to you. You're a whore for press access and you have been cheering on this stupid plan from day one.

Or are we supposed to forget about how you were cheerleading Sinofsky during Windows 8 development as he deleted technical questions that he couldn't answer? Questions that showed everyone what a clueless dolt he was? The Windows Professional community was clearly not happy with Windows 8 and you and Microsoft decided to put all your faith in Sinofsky and just hope all us actual developers and IT admins that predicted the outcome of this stupid fucking plan would be wrong.

I have never in my life seen a software development blog where the most pertinent and technical questions are DELETED less they *correctly* make the head developer er design dictator look full of shit.

Why not incorporate the .NET compact framework? [DELETED]

Why not allow Aero glass as an option since it is already turned off when the battery is used? [DELETED]

I tried Windows 8 with a large user group and they overwhelmingly hated it. We have 40k desktops in our company and you can verify my MSDN account. [DELETED]

Why not incorporate Silverlight as an additional API layer? [DELETED]

How can you expect enterprise to buy Windows RT tablets when it doesn't have Outlook? [DELETED]

Please give a clear explanation as to why the Flash client is supported but not Silverlight. [DELETED]

What proof do you have that Win32 applications are too heavy for mobile use? WinMobile ran a subset of Win32 so please explain in technical terms as to why a new API is needed [DELETED]

Why should we jump on a new API after what happened to Silverlight and WPF? [DELETED]

Why does Microsoft get to build against Win32 in RT and we don't? [DELETED]

I thought half the point of .NET was to build code that wasn't machine dependent, so now you are telling us that the ARM version of Windows won't have the framework? Could you give a technical explanation? [DELETED]
[DELETED]
[DELETED]
[DELETED]

Not a smart way to develop an operating system. Pretty fucking stupid actually and you Paul Harlott supported the NuMicrosoft way from the beginning. Let a design dictator run the place (it's needed to become Apple) and just ignore all those angry Windows professionals that work for companies that actually pay our fucking bills. Just fucking stupid.

Correctly predicted lol.....good Lord you are such a shameless whore. As if you deserve to use those words anymore than Full Disclosure.

Note to readers: No this was not the hammer, this was nice in comparison.

Dick Tracy 2013

Well everyone seems to talking about smartwatches. Supposedly they are going to be the next big thing according to some recent tech articles. Hmmm, color me skeptical.

When I got my first cell phone I actually loved how I didn't have to wear a watch. One device served as watch, phone and calculator. Neat!

The watches I like also tend to be the most impractical. I think a nice gold or silver watch can accentuate a professional look but they are heavy and prone to scratches. They also rub against your laptop and generally get in the way for any type of hands-on work. I'm also the type of person that will look at a watch 10k times while waiting so I'm really glad to be rid of them. Athletic watches can be useful but I would rather just stick my phone in a bag or locker and be away for an hour.

But I blog from both a personal and public/business perspective. Apple has proven that they can sell iAnything so I could see it being worth the investment for them. I think they should focus on competing with Samsung but supposedly Jobs left a list of products for Tim to push out and this may be one of them.

Where I could see this being good from a business standpoint would be health and fitness. I've seen quite a few of those Nike GPS watches and I've also seen a growing popularity in using smartphones as pedometers or to track calories. I could see a smartwatch doing well if marketed as good for health, which I think would work better than the tech hip or status approach.

I certainly don't see them getting as popular as tablets or smartphones since they don't have the same practicality. Want to make a call? Well it's going to be bluetooth or speakerphone. Battery life? Typing? Antenna? Ick.

They're dorky looking. Maybe Apple will come out with a nice design but everything I have seen so far screams Calculator Watch 2.0. I'd rather have the actual Dick Tracy watch or even a Pip Boy design than where one of these.

When those Dick Tracy comics were drawn the idea of talking on the phone anywhere was really the fantasy and not yelling at your watch while at the grocery store. I have to wonder how many tech journalists get enamored with anything small and high tech without really considering mass appeal practicality. Remember the tiny cell phone trend? That's what this reminds me of, too much focus on making the device smaller without regard for practicality. Still there is a market here even if it doesn't have the same mass appeal of the smartphone. How much of a market and how well Apple can market this to the mainstream remains to be seen.

Android is overrated: My 24 hour HTC One experience.

I really don't get Android hype.

After reading about how the HTC One is supposedly God's gift to smartphones I decided to to take one home and try it out.

That lasted 24 hours.

It's not a bad phone but it sure is overrated. The camera stinks compared to the iPhone 5 and the call quality isn't as good either. I have to wonder how many of these smartphone reviews are conducted in the city where antenna strength isn't as noticeable.

What I don't get about Android is how so many people can overlook the fact that the OS is so unrefined and inconsistent. It still feels rather kludgy and using it with nice hardware like the HTC One is like paying extra for a premium edition V8 Mustang the comes with a special edition "1997 retro" interior.

I really wanted to like The One but I have a hard time paying a premium for Android. It just makes more sense as an OS that comes with free phones or cheap tablets.

When I took the phone back and told them my SO had better reception with her iPhone they looked like I walked in and took a dump in the middle of the floor. That's unpossible, you purchased The One. 

The day before the sales guys were like giddy little schoolgirls, fawning over The One and telling me about how I'm going to love it. The main sales guy kept blabbing about using it to watch movies but The One seems incapable of taking a picture of my dog as well as a $50 digital camera from Wal-mart. He also seemed annoyed when my SO remarked that she won't be trying Android until an application she uses for work is ported over. That's unpossible, The One is the bestest smartphone of all time and there is no reason to use anything else. I've already made up my mind so your needs are invalid. 

There seems to be a growing contingent of Android fanboys that hate iPhones and think they are above the masses for using Android. Really? That's like taking pride in buying Safeway select cola instead of drinking Coke with the masses. You're using a product that copied another one, so how much can you really hate the original? (Side note: Safeway select cola is a good knock-off of Coke but the diet needs some work). Even stranger is that the masses are buying more Androids than iPhones at the moment and yet I still run into these fanboys that act like they are part of a special order.

I just don't get the excitement over any of the Android phones. Sure they have some nice hardware but the OS still feels like a work in progress. I can see getting the S3 for $0.00 but actually paying a premium for Android? I just don't get the hype.